Calvin at Camp: Never Had a Friend Like Ed
by Blue Paratroopa
Summary: Double D finds himself with three genies, formally the Hitchhiking Ghosts, who will give him three wishes. However, the Koopas are also after them, which means a crazy songfilled road trip! Without the road, though. Parody of Disney's Aladdin.
1. A Dark Night

The sun was setting. Camp would be over soon. Some kids had left. However, Eddy was only starting. Lugging a cart full of objects, he rode through the halls on Ed, who was walking like a camel.

(To the tune of "Arabian Nights")

Eddy: **_Oh I come from a site, from a popular site_**

_**Where the good and bad authors write**_

_**Where some stories are great**_

_**Some are merely third-rate**_

_**Some are stupid, and a real blight**_

_**With creativity**_

_**We are careful that we**_

_**Write something that is oh, so slick**_

_**So pay up**_

_**Cash I need**_

_**Listen now as I read**_

_**This tale, just another fanfic**_

****

_**Another fanfic**_

_**Yet not like all the rest**_

'_**Cause we all work hard**_

_**To narrate like bards**_

_**So we know it's the best**_

****

_**Another fanfic**_

_**But it's worth all your dough**_

_**So listen up now**_

_**And I'll tell you how**_

_**Good parodies go**_

They walked outside. Eddy hopped down and set up a small shop as Ed wandered off. Facing his audience, Eddy began a spiel: "Welcome to Arab Eddy's! We've got your finest stereotypical Arab merchandise! It'll bring you straight back to the _Thief of Bagdad_, whatever that is. How about this genuine Arab sword? It cuts through anything!" Demonstrating, he waved the sword around, accidently breaking it on a bench. "...except wood. How about this music box? It plays the 'Mexican Hat...' I mean, the 'Arabian Hat Dance!' Or what about this?" He pulled out a small rusty lamp, the kind that were used a long time ago. "This here's a genuine Arabian lamp. Don't be fooled by the fact it's rusty and probably infected. It's what's on the inside that counts."

His audience losing interest and leaving, Eddy struggled to get their attention again. "Hold on a second! This ain't no ordinary lamp! It helped out a guy a lot once. The guy who liked this lamp was more than what he seemed. A diamond in the rough. Ooh, that's deep. So do you wanna hear the story?"

Eddy grabbed some sand and threw it in the sky, where they turned to stars, twinkling in the night.

"It begins on a dark night...where some dark guys wait...with a dark purpose."

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_**It all started one night**_

_**Not a fray or a fight**_

_**But some villains were gathered 'round**_

_**And the subject of hype was some lone sewer pipe**_

_**For inside, treasure would be found**_

_**And the biggest of all, a huge shadow quite tall**_

_**Thought being evil was a kick**_

_**If he looks familiar, it's because he's Bowser**_

_**A villain in another fanfic**_

Bowser and his eight Koopalings were indeed sitting around a sewer pipe that was in front of the camp building. The pipe was completely overflowing with gunk and goop. It was impossible to get in. A fat man with yellow overalls and a pointy mustache approached him.

"You're late, Wario," said Bowser.

"Sorry 'bout that. I was on my way here when Mario dared me to eat a poison mushroom...I've really gotta stop listening to that guy."

"He dared me to put lava in my shell once..." admitted Jr.

"Pathetic," said the other Koopalings.

"Whatever," said Bowser. "Do you have the thing or not?"

Wario grinned. "I had to blow up a few strip malls, but I got it."

"Did you really HAVE to blow them up?" asked Roy Koopa.

"No, but my day wouldn't have been complete without it."

"I'm not a patient guy!" growled Bowser. "Hand it over!"

Wario didn't move. "You said I'd be paid."

Bowser rolled his eyes. "Well, I was gonna pay you by NOT having my kids jump you, but..."

The Koopalings instantly swarmed all over Wario and grabbed something from him. A miniature golden figure that looked like a ride vehicle from Disneyland.

"Finally!" Bowser cried in victory. "The second golden Doombuggy half! Score!" Bowser pulled out one half of his own and put the two of them together. The finished Doombuggy glowed and took off through the night sky. "Get them!" shouted the Koopa.

They chased the Doombuggy. It did a little flip in air and then dove down into the pipe. All the gunk covering the entrance cleared.

"Who knew that there was magic hidden in front of this stupid camp?" breathed Bowser. "Now that the gunk is cleared, we can get inside!"

"Uh," said Ludwig, "if we had to use a magical golden charm to gain access, wouldn't that hint that this thing is actually dangerous?"

"Good point," admitted Bowser. "...Wario can go first."

"Me!" complained Wario.

"You can keep all that you find, but the lamp is MINE!" Bowser reminded him.

Wario approached the pipe. "Keep all I can find? It's a sewer. There's probably all this contaminated scum...cool!"

As Wario began to climb in, a sarcastic-sounding nasal voice coming from inside the pipe boomed, "Who dares approach the Sewer Pipe of Wonders?"

"Uh...me. Wario."

"The stupid fat guy?" asked a different voice, this one lower and silly-sounding.

"That's me!" Wario said proudly.

"You suck," grunted a scratchy voice.

"Same to you!" Wario shot back.

"We don't want this guy in here!" the nasal voice was heard whispering to the other two voices. "What do we do?"

"How about we make up a dumb rule?" suggested the silly voice. "Like we name a metaphor and then only the guy matching the description can come in?"

"Good idea," said the nasal voice, "but I stink at metaphors."

The silly voice called to Wario again. "You can only enter if you're a...um...a..."

"I'm stuck," admitted the nasal voice.

"A diamond in the rough!" cried the scratchy voice.

"Yeah," agreed the nasal voice, "a diamond in the...what! That's stupid!" A sound was heard that sounded like someone getting smacked with a ball and chain. "Fine, fine," sighed the nasal voice, "a diamond in the rough.:

"What does that mean?" asked Wario.

"We'll make it simple for you," said the silly voice. "You're not a diamond in the rough, so go away."

"Hey, guys!" Wario called back to the Koopas. "They say I'm not allowed!"

"You're a villain, you idiot!" groaned Bowser. "Forget them."

"Good point." Wario climbed in. Suddenly, the pipe started gurgling. It blasted Wario out and into the distance in a geyser of muck and goo.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"I guess he's not the one," said Larry.

"Not the one!" exploded Morton. "NOT THE ONE! Of course he's not the one! He's another failure! We're never gonna get the lamp! What a surprise! Wario isn't noble! There's a newsflash! He's ugly, greedy, selfish, mean, nasty! It makes perfect sense he's not the one! What are we gonna do? WHAT? We're in trouble, guys! We're in super-duper, gigantic, really awful..."

Roy cut him off by punching the Koopa into his shell. "Shut up already!"

"Okay, no more ranting," Bowser told his kids. "Wario's a freak anyway."

A lightbulb appeared over Iggy's head. "Hey, wait a second!"

"What if we're the diamonds in the rough?" cried Lemmy, sensing his brother's idea.

"Me first!" yelled Wendy.

All the Koopalings piled into the pipe, which blasted them away as well.

"Dang," said Bowser, watching them fly away as well. He turned to the sewer pipe. "Hey, where did you send them?"

"Back to your castle via magic," said the nasal voice. "You wanna go, too?"

"Thanks. I really appreciate this." Bowser climbed in and was blasted away like his kids. "I've gotta find this diamond in the rooooooooouuuuuuggggghhhhh!"

"Diamond in the rough!" giggled the silly voice. "That's clever."

"Thanks," said the scratchy voice. "I read fortune cookies."

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The "It all started one night" song bit is to also to the tune of "Arabian Nights." There were supposed to be several reprises throughout the story, all of which were later cut. However, parodies of them will be found here.


	2. On the Run Again

The next day, Eddy and Edd, after yet another scam had failed, were being chased through camp by Kevin and Rolf.

"We'll get you, dorks!" called Kevin.

"Rolf will not allow himself to be fooled by a trio of sneaky badgers!"

"I knew that stupid carpet scam wouldn't work!" complained Eddy as they turned a corner.

Edd rolled his eyes. "Well, excuse me for trying to show these kids the delicate beauty of detail! YOU were the one who said they could fly!"

"They wouldn't have bought them otherwise! " defended Eddy.

Edd suddenly stopped running. "Wait a second! Where's Ed?"

"Darn it," sighed Eddy, "they must have caught him:

"We'll have to go rescue the lovable oaf."

As they turned around, Kevin cut them off, cornering them. "But who's gonna rescue you?"

Ed suddenly jumped out of nowhere onto Kevin's head, crushing him. "Cookies are a sometimes food!"

"Ed!" cried Eddy.

"You're alive!" said Edd, sighing with relief.

"Fear not for me, for I start every morning with a steaming bowl of gravy!"

Edd smiled. "Yes, well, we can discuss your dietary habits once we're a safe distance from Kevin."

Eddy started running again. "You've got that right! We've just gotta keep..."

(To the tune of "One Jump Ahead")

Eddy: **_One jump ahead of the tough guys_**

_**One swing ahead of the fist**_

_**No one said life was always bliss**_

Ed: Yay, Showstoppers!

(Eddy and the others run through the halls, being chased)

Edd: **_One jump ahead of our victims_**

_**Although we've ripped them off**_

_**Too bad they're not kind to us or soft**_

Kevin: **_Swindlers_**

Rolf: **_Ed-boys_**

Kevin: **_We don't..._**

Rolf:**_ ...enjoy!_**

Eddy: **_Hey, I need the dough here_**

Rolf and Kevin: **_Getting ripped off, we say no here_**

Edd:**_ Let's face it, that's life, it happens sometimes_**

_**We've gotta stick together now**_

All Three Eds: **_Wow!_**

(They pass by Calvin, Hobbes, Jason and Marcus)

Calvin and Hobbes: **_Once again the Eds are on the run now_**

_**They've stolen money from kids again**_

Jason and Marcus: **_Can't they figure out that it's not fun now_**

Eddy: **_Look, it's my hobby, I don't insult yours_**

_**So leave me alone then**_

Edd: **_One jump ahead of enemies_**

Eddy: **_Always must watch my back_**

Ed: **_We steal just so we can eat a snack_**

Edd: **_One jump ahead of a beating_**

Ed: **_One yard away from the pain_**

Eddy: **_Can't blame us if we may complain_**

Kevin: **_Get them!_**

Rolf: **_Too slick!_**

Kevin: **_Pain we'll..._**

Rolf: **_...inflict!_**

Edd: **_Can't we use our words here?_**

(Marie Kanker jumps out and hugs Edd)

Marie: **_I've got a thing for the nerd here_**

Eddy: **_Gotta dodge Kevin, stay away from Rolf_**

_**The Kankers sisters, too**_

All Three Eds: **_Eww!_**

Edd: **_One jump ahead of their anger_**

(**_Beat them!_**)

Eddy: **_One hop ahead of the hun_**

(**_Punch him!_**)

Ed: **_One trick ahead of the bad stuff_**

(**_Stop them!_**)

Edd: **_Frankly, I have had enough_**

(**_Crunch him!_**)

(The chase leads them to a corner by a stool. Kevin stands up on it with a heavy book, prepared to squash them with it. Rolf stands by him)

Eddy: **_Here goes, three of us are trapped now_**

_**We're gonna get slapped now**_

_**All we gotta do is run!**_

On the final line, Eddy kicked the stool out from under Kevin, making him fall on top of Rolf. The book fell as well, squashing both of them. The Eds ran for it.

"Ha ha!" laughed a relived Eddy as they made their escape into the hall. "We did it! Time to cash our bucks in!"

"Double D," asked Ed, "does the Beast from _Beauty and the Beast _really make a cameo in _Aladdin_?"

"Indeed he does," said Edd, "although I have no idea how _Aladdin_ is relevant to any of this." Edd suddenly noticed Linus and Rerun by the vending machine. "Hello, boys. Planning on buying something?"

"Actually, we're just looking..." admitted Linus. "We don't have any money."

Edd smiled. "Here. Use mine."

Rerun was surprised. "Really? Thanks!"

"Not a problem. I'm not that hungry anyway."

Eddy had been watching the whole thing. "WHAT WAS THAT?" he yelled when Linus and Rerun had left.

Edd shrugged. "Well, they were hungry, so..."

"We risked our lives for that money, and you give your share to kids! You might as well just let us have it next time, if you're planning on wasting it! Talk about naive! Let's go, Ed."

Ed walked away with Eddy. "Cantaloupes make me giggle."

Edd watched the two of them leave. "I wish he would understand. Maybe if he were to actually be generous for a change...well, it doesn't matter..."

_**Stupid, naive**_

_**They all believe**_

_**That I can't do great things**_

_**But is that all true, then?**_

_**No siree**_

_**I'll show them there's so much more to me**_

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This is actually the SECOND time "One Jump Ahead" has been sang in a story, the first being by Calvin in "Ego Attack."

I've been wanting to do an Aladdin story for quite a while. For a long time, I was stuck on characters. First I wanted a whole thing about the Darkling returning and wanting to be wished back into power, so he possed Double D who would be Jafar and Eddy would be Iago and the Ghostmaster Trio would be the genie...clearly, this was too confusing.

Then there was the issue of Aladdin himself. Of course, Calvin was the first considered, but why would he be in love? One idea was to have the whole story be a joke. At the end it would be revealed that he only wanted to be close to her so he could smack her with a waterballoon. Then, there was the idea of dropping love from the plot entirly and have him trying to get attention, but that was too similar to "The Calvin King" and "Hercules."

Once Edd was made Aladdin, the whole thing fell into place. Thankfully.


	3. The Koopas Attack

Back in Darkland, Bowser was pacing through his castle. "Diamond in the rough...diamond in the rough...what does it all mean!"

Morton ran over. "Maybe you should consult the wonders of the Internet! I'll bet Wikipedia will get you somewhere. Try not to use Jeeves, 'cause he never has any answers. Hey, maybe Ebay will get you something! Or maybe some fanfics about it will help! Oh, what about good ol' Google?"

"Can't you bother someone else?" groaned Bowser.

"I'm just thinking, brainstorming, pondering, King Dad," Morton said innocently.

"Well, ponder in a soundproof room!" yelled Bowser.

"I have a habit of breaking those things.

Bowser had an idea. "Wait a second! We can use this crystal ball!" He grabbed the ball, which was sitting on a table and shook it while asking "What is a diamond in the rough?"

Words appeared in the crystal: "Ask again later."

"It probably needs more power..." said Bowser. "I have an idea."

"This may be bad," realized Morton.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Edd was walking though the camp's halls when he saw Nazz sitting in a chair in the distance. "Ah, Nazz," he thought to himself. "I once was an item with you...until the Koopas came. For your own protection, I broke up without honestly saying why. If only we could reconnect...if only. But you would never understand. I'd sound like a fool..."

Nazz screamed. Edd looked up to see that she was now surrounded by the Kankers.

"Well, well, well," smiled Lee, "if it ain't little miss Nazz."

Marie jumped in her face. "Admit it! You're trying to steal our men!"

"Your men?" repeated Nazz. "You mean the Eds?"

"Yeah!" said May. "We've seen how they look at you!"

"All flirty-flirty," added Lee. "We ain't amused."

Nazz got out of her chair and backed against the wall. "You've got it all wrong, girls!"

"Oh, no," Marie said with an evil look in her eyes. "We know everything."

"And we're not happy," said May.

Nazz smiled weakly. "Please, can't we talk? Girl power?"

"You're about to feel some MAJOR girl power!" growled Lee. "Get her!"

Edd sprinted over, ignoring his overwhelming fear of the Kankers. "Hold it right there!"

"Come to watch me defend our love?" asked Marie.

"Heavens, no! I'm simply here to preform some..." Edd thought for a second. "...cheap parlor tricks?"

May jumped up and down. "Oh boy! I love cheap parlor tricks!"

"I hoped as much," said Edd. "For this, you all must close your eyes."

The second the Kankers did, Edd grabbed Nazz. "Run for it!"

Lee looked up to see them disappear outside. "Hey! Get back here! You haven't seen the last of us!"

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Bowser, meanwhile, had his all his kids running on a treadmill, generating electricity for the crystal ball. "Run faster! We've gotta power this crystal ball up!"

"Why aren't YOU running?" complained Iggy.

"Because I'm the main villain, not a wacky sidekick."

"Aww, but you're our own father!" reminded Lemmy.

"Good point," admitted Bowser, "but I take so much abuse in these stories already, so I figured it was okay to turn the tormenting spotlight over to someone else."

Wendy thought about this for a second. "Makes sense."

Roy yawned. "I'm taking a break." The tough Koopaling sat on top of Jr.

"Hey!" squealed Jr.

"That looks like fun," said Larry. All the kids piled on Jr.

"Can't...run...much...longer..." gasped Jr. He collapsed, causing all of the Koopas to fly off the treadmill, splattering against the wall. The vibrations knocked the crystal ball off of the table.

Bowser picked the crystal ball up. "Hey, it's working again. I guess we only had to smack it."

"Convenient," croaked Jr.

Bowser gazed excitedly into the crystal ball. "And the diamond in the rough is...Double D? Man, will the surprises never end? Am I right?"

The Koopalings rolled their eyes.

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Back at camp, Edd and Nazz hid in the shade outside. "That was so awesome!" cried Nazz.

Edd blushed. "Oh, it was nothing. Really. Tricking a Kanker is as easy as...well, as tricking a Kanker. Are you all right?"

"I'm fine. I haven't really gotten a chance to talk to you for a while."

"Oh, um, yes, well..." Edd looked nervous. "I suppose things have been rather awkward since the whole, well, you know..."

"The Broadway show?"

"Yes. That. Nazz, if I could just explain to you what happened, everything would be..." he turned away. "No, you'd think I was crazy."

Nazz touched his face. "I'd never think that."

"Well, what happened was..."

Suddenly, Ludwig emerged from around a corner. "You! Human!"

Edd rolled his eyes. "Oh, now this is just ironic."

Morton bounced around. "Attack, charge, get him!"

"I fear we must run again!" cried Edd.

"You bet!" agreed Nazz. She and Nazz ran around the building.

"Do you trust me?" asked Edd.

"Sure, why do you ask?"

"Something told me to say that...I'm not sure what, though."

Roy jumped out of nowhere and grabs Edd. "I got the dork!"

"Don't tell me you call people dorks, too," groaned Edd.

"Hey, aren't you those guys that show up sometimes?" asked Nazz.

Wendy glared at her. "Guys? We're Koopas, kid!"

Nazz stared in confusion. "Like in video games?"

"The one, the only!" grinned Morton. "We've existed the whole time! We've always been here! Always plotting to get you! And now we've finally caught someone! And once king dad has magically taken over everything, we'll come back for the rest of everyone! HA!"

The Koopas opened up a Mario book, which warped them and Edd into the Mushroom Kingdom.

"Double D!" Nazz called after him.

"This is a normal occurrence," Edd cried as he disappeared into the book, "I assure you!"

Nazz ran inside, not believing what she had just witnessed. "Kevin! Kevin! Double D was just kidnaped by freaky Nintendo monster things!"

"Uh, have you been hanging around with the Eds too much? I think their weirdness is starting to rub off."

"They're my friends!" defended Nazz. "I don't know what to do. Where are Calvin and those guys? Maybe they know..."

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Calvin and Hobbes, at this point, appeared to be scaling a huge snowy mountain in a blizzard.

"We're really doing it, Hobbes!" cried Calvin.

"The Matterhorn!" said Hobbes. A snowmonster came out of a cave. "Look out!" pointed Hobbes. "A yeti!"

In reality, it was really just Eddy. Calvin and Hobbes were only climbing a tree.

"Who are you calling a yeti?" growled Eddy.

"Take this, monster!" Calvin and Hobbes threw water balloons at him. Jason and Marcus stood by them, playing polka music.

"And what are YOU guys doing?" asked Eddy.

"Adding ambience," said Marcus.

Jason nodded. "Get with the groove, man."

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"Look," Kevin told Nazz, "I'm sure he's fine. He's too dorky to get himself kidnaped by anyone."

"I'm tired of you saying bad things about him!" cried Nazz.

Ed walked over. "Fear not, as I, Ed, will bravely go where we've all been before!"

"What?"

"Here I come to save the day!" Ed bounded off.

"I hope he's okay..." sighed Nazz.


	4. The Sewer Pipe of Wonders

Eddy (narrating):**_ Way down in a fortress was a kid in distress_**

_**Double D was soon chained to the wall**_

_**And in that one big room full of darkness and gloom**_

_**He found himself feeling quite small**_

_**Would this just be the end? All alone with no friends?**_

_**The thought of this made him sick**_

_**But not all hope is gone, he's a hero, come on!**_

_**And they USUALLY win in the fic**_

"Oh, curse Nintendo!" moaned Double D, who was indeed in a Koopa dungeon. "This dungeon is filthy! Not to mention that these chains may leave a lasting bruise..."

Suddenly, a familiar face appeared in a window. "Never fear, Ed is here!"

"Ed!" called Double D. "How happy I am to see you! Pray tell, where are the others?"

"Scaling the Matterhorn!"

"Oh. I see."

Ed pulled off his eyebrow and used it as a key to unlock Double D's shackles.

"Thank you, Ed," smiled Double D. "I had no idea that your eyebrow was multi functional."

Ed put it back in. "That's why I never leave home without it!"

Double D looked around. "Unfortunately, now that you're down here, we're both trapped."

"That makes three of us," said a voice in the corner. An old orange Koopa dressed as a wizard stepped out from the darkness.

"Way cool!" cried Ed. "It is Kamek the Magikoopa from Yoshi's Island!"

"Can I assume he's an enemy?" asked Edd/

"Yep. I'll stomp on him for you." Ed jumped for Kamek, who moved out of the way, causing the boy to smash a crater in the floor.

"Hold on a second, you two," said the Magikoopa, "Think to yourself now. Why would a villain be locked in a dungeon?"

"Perhaps you're planning a revolution?" Double D guessed.

"Actually, I am. But that's not why I'm here. Mean old Bowser got bored with me. Said I was useless and only good for Mario Party games. And so I ended up here. However, I know of a great magical force that exists by your camp. We can use it to defeat him and his army once and for all!"

Ed raised his hand. "Can you turn me into Salvo the Slime?"

"Consider something, Kamek," interrupted Double D. "How would we even get out?"

"There's a way out that Bowser is unaware of." Kamek opened a passageway, revealing a long stream of rocks leading across a huge pool of lava full of Podabos.

"A tad dangerous, isn't it?" stared Double D.

Kamek rolled his eyes. "Fine, I also have the keys. What a baby."

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Eddy (narrating): **_The poor guy was a wreck but he followed Kamek_**

_**And the duo warped back to camp**_

_**Happy he wasn't dead, he was followed by Ed**_

_**Who wanted his pal to be champ**_

_**They at last reached the place, and by the look of his face**_

_**Double D suspected a trick**_

_**But he stepped forward still, hoping he'd live until**_

_**The end of another fanfic**_

When Double D approached the pipe, he was greeted by the nasal voice from before: "Who the hell are you?"

"You're not supposed to ask like that," snapped the silly voice. "Be polite. Are you the diamond in the rough?"

"I'm not quite sure what you mean by that, but my name is Edd with two Ds, hence the nickname Double D."

"Proceed," said the scratchy voice. "Touch nothing but the lamp."

"Can I come, too?" asked Ed.

"Sure," said the silly voice, "we love comedy relief!"

"Remember!" called Kamek, as the two climbed in. "Get me the lamp!"

"Messy, messy, messy..." sighed Double D, as he and Ed crawled through the sewers. They were cramped, and the walls were green and moldy. It was a truly disgusting place.

"Look at this slime!" marveled Ed. "It's like being in my nose!"

"Thank you for sharing that with me, Ed. But DON'T touch it. We're not allowed."

Ed was disappointed. "Aww..."

"I'm actually, quite suspicious of our ex-villain friend," admitted Double D. "If he had the keys and knew about the other way out, then how come he waited until we showed up? It's as if he knew we would arrive. Still, knowing the Koopas, he would surly zap us if we refused..."

Ed pointed ahead. "A light I see!"

"It's..." began Double D, before they entered the room. It was full of gold treasure. "...amazing. Ed, how come you're not going crazy trying to grab all of this amazing treasure?"

"It's not edible."

"Well, neither was the slime..." Double D suddenly shuddered. "Never mind."

"Look!" said Ed, as they left the treasure room. "We are walking into another mood change!"

He was right. They were entering a dark blue cavern with a lake of glowing blue sludge in the middle. There, sitting in the gunk, was a mountain with a glowing light on top.

"I fear I must journey to the top, Ed," said Double D.

"Don't be silly." Ed grabbed Double D and threw him all the way up.

"Thank you!" called Double D. He turned to the glowing light, to see that it rested on the lamp. He picked it up. "This is what I've been sent to find? A simple Arabian lamp?"

Suddenly, he heard Ed say: "What does this button do?" He pressed a button marked "Spring Indiana Jones-Style Booby Traps." A smaller sign under it said "Hee, hee, we said 'booby.'"

"NOOOOOOOO!" cried Double D.

Upon the button's activation, the room turned red for some reason. The staircase Double D was on turned into a slope, and he fell for the now lava-like sludge below.

"Messy, messy, messy!" moaned the boy.

Seeing his friend in danger, Ed took off his jacket and blew it up like a balloon. He flew over and caught Double D before he could fall in the red sludge. "Let's go, Double D!"

They flew through the cavern and the treasure room, avoiding various arrows, flames, traps, and of course, the enormous wave of sludge following them.

"Ed, you've saved me yet again!" Double D shouted over the sounds of destruction. "You're full of surprises today!"

"Oh, that's nothing. You should see me in the bathroom!"

Double D sighed deeply. "...and here I thought the nostril comment was the worst thing I heard."

They were now just managing to scramble through the tight part of the pipe. The opening with the waiting Koopa was just ahead.

"Kamek!" panted Double D. "We're here!"

"Give me the lamp!" shouted Kamek.

"Priorities, please," Double D rolled his eyes. "We're about to be coated in slime!"

In response, Kamek whipped out his wand. "Give me the lamp OR DIE!"

"Bowser never really fired you, did he?" Double D asked sarcastically.

Kamek finally reached in and snatched the lamp away. "We've got it! The Koopas have the lamp! And of course, I was going to zap you anyway."

Kamek raised his wand when Ed jumped out and attacked him. "Leave Double D alone!"

"Get offa me, you lump!" hissed Kamek. He threw Ed into the sewers, who bumped into Double D. The two rolled down a few feet, then quickly got up and frantically crawled to the opening again. Just as they managed to emerge, the wave of slime that had been approaching swept over them, carrying the two away.

"Finally!" cheered Kamek. "Lord Bowser!"

Bowser's face appeared in the magic wand. "Did you get it?"

"Sure did!" the Magikoopa said proudly. "It's right...uh-oh."

"WHERE IS IT?"

Kamek turned towards the sewer, which now had a clogged entrance again. Was it possible that...? "This is not good."

"I'm gonna kill you!" yelled Bowser. The wand flew around, smacking Kamek.

"Ow! Sorry! Sorry! Forgive me! OW!"


	5. The Hitchhiking Genies

Down in the sewers, Double D woke up. He and Ed were completely surrounded by a thick layer of sewer gunk. "Well, Ed, I think we're trapped."

"I can eat our way out!" said Ed. "This could take a while."

"And worst of all," continued Double D, "the Koopas have this lamp, which can't be good."

Ed pulled something out of his pocket. "No they don't! I got it!"

Double D smiled and took the lamp. "My, that was actually quite resourceful of you! Oh dear, it's so dirty. I wonder why the Koopas wanted this..." He started to clean it.

Upon being rubbed, the lamp began to glow and bounced around. Suddenly, three laughing blue spirits shot out.

"MAN!" shouted one that looked like a skeleton with a nasal voice. "It's great to be outta there! No more sharing a bedroom with these guys!"

"Aww," said a fat one with a silly voice, "we were like brothers..."

"We're already half-brothers, Phineas."

"Still."

The last one, a short guy with a big beard and a scratchy voice, pointed to Double D. "Guys, check out the master."

"Hey," grinned the skeleton, "you're that wimpy guy!"

"And you're that odd trio of ghosts that was here before," said Double D.

Ed hugged them. "Way cool! Real ghosts! Love me!"

Phineas, the fat one, squirmed away. "Uh, how about we don't touch?"

"So, what'll it be, master?" asked the skeleton.

"Master?" repeated Double D.

Phineas nodded. "Yep! We're all-powerful genies now! I'm Phineas, the skeleton guy's Ezra, and this cute little one is Gus!"

"Might I ask..." began Double D.

"How we became magic?" guessed Ezra. "Well, it all started at Disney World. We were flying through Adventureland and saw the Genie from _Aladdin_. Everyone loved him and we didn't know why!"

Double D rolled his eyes. "Could it be because he was in a good movie, had fun songs, was animated well, and was an amusing character all over?"

"Yeah, we shoulda figured that, but at the time, we thought they liked him because he was a cool genie. So we decided to become genies ourselves! We talked to our crystal ball-dwelling housemate, Madame Leota, who was suspiciously happy to transform us."

"She was happy, of course," said Phineas, "because when we became genies, we ended up here."

"Stink city, USA," grumbled Gus.

"But luckily," smiled Phineas, "we could choose who was allowed to find us...you. The diamond in the rough."

Double D nodded. "I understand! I have a shabby exterior, but I'm good on the inside."

"Right!" cried Ezra. "We drove stupid Bowser nuts with that one. Anyway, you get three wishes, one from each ghost...or rather, genie."

Double D stared at the three ghosts/genies. "I've seen some odd things at this camp, but this is all highly improbable."

"Master!" cried Ezra, as jazzy music started up. "I don't think you quite realize what you've got here! So why don't you just ruminate, whilst we illuminate the possibilities."

(To the tune of "Friend Like Me")

Ezra: **_Well, we know that you don't believe your eyes_**

_**You think the sewer fumes mess with your head**_

_**But trust us, you're in luck, 'cause we three guys**_

_**Double as genies and ghosts, all dead**_

Phineas: **_You got some witty sidekicks with you now_**

Gus: **_The critics give us an "A-OK" stamp_**

Ezra: **_You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how_**

Phineas: **_See all you gotta do is rub that lamp_**

Gus: **_And we'll say_**

Phineas: **_Mister Double D, sir_**

_**We will always agree**_

Gus: **_Long as you don't like Disney Channel_**

Ezra: **_You ain't never had friends like us three_**

Ha ha ha!

Phineas: **_Just simply call our names_**

Ezra: **_Ezra, Gus, Phinny_**

Gus: **_And we'll come running, so we can prove_**

All Three: **_You ain't never had friends like us three_**

Phineas: **_Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service_**

Gus: **_And jokes 'bout lots of stuff_**

Ezra: **_And though we're not mean_**

_**We're quite obscene**_

_**Our dirty humor is never enough**_

Gus: **_We really like you guys_**

Ezra: **_Why, we're club Double D_**

Phineas: **_So wish away, 'cause like I say_**

All Three: **_You ain't never had friends like us three_**

Ezra: **_Can your friends do this?_** (Didn't think so)

Phineas: **_Do your friends do that?_** (Nope? Of course not!)

Gus: **_Do your friends pull this out their little hat?_**

Ezra: **_Can you friends go, poof!_**

_**I thought as much**_

Gus: **_Can your friends go, Abracadabra, let're rip_**

_**And make slapstick, wackiness and such?**_

Ezra: **_So don't be a skeptic party poop_**

_**We're here to answer all your midday prayers**_

Phineas: **_You got an amazing hitchhiking group_**

_**You got three guys who can get some weird stares**_

Gus: **_We got a powerful urge to help you out_**

_**Come on and confess your secret dreams**_

Ezra: **_You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt_**

Phineas: **_And we'll surly help you, so don't scream_**

All Three: **_Adventures will be had with the guys from Disney_**

Ezra: **_We're really sweet and we repeat_**

Phineas: **_You ain't never had friends like, never had friends like_**

Gus: **_You ain't never had friends like, never had friends like_**

All Three: **_You ain't never had friends like...us...three!_**

Ezra: **_You ain't never had friends like us three!_**

Yeah!

"Give my regards to Broadway!" applauded Ed.

"That was very...fun," agreed Double D.

"So what'll it be?" grinned Ezra.

Double D stood up. "I can wish for anything?"

"Wellllllllllllllllllll, not ANYTHING," admitted Ezra. "There are three rules!"

"First, we can't kill anyone," said Phineas, as a huge anvil fell on him, "so no funny cartoon deaths. Actually, 'cartoon death' is a bit of an oxymoron."

Gus burst out of the ground, looking like a rotting corpse. "Second, we can't bring anyone back from the dead. Ironic, 'cause we're part ghost."

Ezra bounced over. "And finally, we can't make anyone fall in love! Not because it's morally wrong, but I think they're just worried about us making some hot girl on girl action. Crap."

Double D winked at Ed. "So...you cannot grant any wish? And here you said you were all-powerful. How amusing."

"I bet they can't whip up good gravy!" agreed Ed.

"Or even get us out of this sewer," continued Double D.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" shouted Ezra.

Gus picked up his ball and chain. "Let's pound them!"

"No," said Phineas, "let's just prove we can get out of here!"

"All we need is a rocket," grinned Ezra, making one appear out of nowhere.

Double D nervously climbed in. "A rocket? Couldn't we just dig through the gunk with some type of drill?"

"It's more interesting if you do it this way!" said Phineas, hopping in as well.

"That's what she said!" cried Ezra. "Alright, Gus, count us down!"

"We're blasting off in ten...nine...eight...whatever, now."

They blasted off, shooting through the gunk. Ezra gave a sports-like commentary as they sailed through. "And we're moving right along, the stuff is like liquid, be sure to keep your eyes and mouths shut...here's the exit."

As they started to fly out, some gunk got caught on the back of the rocket, holding them. "And we're coming out---wait, no we're not," continued Ezra. "What's this? Interference? Can't have that!" He whipped out a pair of giant scissors and cut them free. "Sorry, goop, but you don't make the cut! HA!"

"That was a stupid joke," said Gus, as they sailed into the sky.

"Almost as stupid as 'Diamond in the Rough,'" agreed Phineas. Gus smacked him. "OW!"

* * *

"Friend Like Me" was actually preformed by Ezra already in one of the Haunted Mansion forums. The ghosts are making their second appearence here, first in "The Muppet Movie Episode." They're not to be confused with the Ghostmaster gang. 


	6. The New Double D

Bowser and his kids paced through the castle. "I don't believe it!" ranted Bowser. "Those kids probably have the lamp now!"

"That's life, King Dad..." began Lemmy.

"...stuff happens," finished Iggy.

"Can't we just force our way in and get the lamp ourselves?" suggested Roy.

"I'm too lazy," said Bowser. "It's more fun to complain, ya know?"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Hitchhiker's rocket, meanwhile, landed at an oasis. "Welcome, to scenic Uncharted Oasis!" grinned Ezra. "Hope you like your stay!"

"Thank you very much," said Double D. "Now I can ponder my three wishes in peace."

"Three?" smiled Phineas. "And here we thought you were smart! You've got two left."

"Technically, I never wished my way out..." Double D pointed out the them. "You all did that on your own."

"Eddy would call you pigeons!" laughed Ed.

Phineas fainted. "My heart!"

"Can I pound them now?" asked Gus.

"No, Gus..." sighed Ezra. When the ghost wasn't looking, Gus dropped his ball and chain on Double D's foot.

"Ow!" cried Double D. "Pain! pain, pain, pain!"

"What are you gonna wish for?" asked Ed.

"Maybe for his foot to stop hurting," guessed Phineas.

Double D leaned against a tree. "Very funny. I've had worse than this. What would you three wish for?"

"A Broadway show of every Disney movie!" cried Phineas.

"No, no, no!" groaned Ezra. "We'd wish for freedom!"

"I miss our friends back in the mansion..." agreed Phineas.

"Trapped in a lamp for a few weeks is bad," admitted Gus.

"A few weeks?" exclaimed Ezra. "We'll be there forever! The only way to get out is to be wished free."

"I could wish you free," Double D looked up.

"YEAH, RIGHT!" chorused the ghosts.

"We're guys like you!" said Ezra. "We can't commit! How do we know you can?"

Double D shook his head. "I'm completely serious and painfully honest. I promise I'll use my final wish to free you."

Gus glared at him. "I've learned never trust a guy you just smashed the foot of."

"Well," shrugged Phineas, "we've got no choice. Okay."

"But until then," said Ezra, "what are you gonna wish for?"

Double D smiled. "Well, there's a girl at my camp..."

"And you wanna see her do someone else?" grinned Ezra.

"Sorry," said Phineas, "can't grant it."

"Oh, she already loves me," said Double D.

"And she was all worried about you when the Koopas came," said Ed.

Double D blushed. "She was! I must impress her when I return! Perhaps if I was stronger..."

"Stronger?" cried Ezra. "We can do that!"

"Well then...I wish I was strong!"

"Oh boy!" cheered Phineas. "Our first real wish! I'm so nervous!"

"Let's see," said Ezra. "We could just give you just some normal muscles OR there's the steroids package! Not only are you freakishly huge, but we throw in some man-boobs and a high-pitched voice!"

"But he already has the voice," Phineas pointed out. "Man-boobs would be redundant."

"Fine," said Ezra, "I'll keep those for myself."

"I never know when that guy's joking..." whispered Gus.

"Milk 'em, cowboy!" called Ed.

Ezra flew around excitedly. "Okay, master, you'll be Popeye in a few seconds!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Back at camp, Bowser and his kids were on the roof of the camp building watching the kids marching off to camp.

"Okay," Bowser told the Koopalings, "we're on a part kidnap, part rescue, part murder mission. We have to nab another kid, get them into the sewers to recover the lamp, and then get rid of Double D and Ed!"

"I'm bored!" complained Wnedy. "Call me when we're actually doing something."

"I never said this would be perfect," admitted Bowser. "But once we've taken over the kingdom...then we'll have some fun."

"Kevin," Nazz was saying to Kevin in the line of kids, "those Koopas really came and got Double D!"

Calvin heard them. "Koopas! Here? I knew it! It's been a while since they invaded!"

"A while!" cried Eddy. "It's been, like, three days!"

"That's a lot for the Koopas," said Hobbes. "How does Nazz know about them?"

Calvin pulled out a packet of paper and began to scribble away. "Okay, we'll have to stock up on items to save him. We're gonna need a dozen fire flowers, a few feathers, countless P-Wings, and a Frog Suit or two to be safe."

"I've narrowed the location of Double D down to twenty places," said Jason, marking things in his Nintendo Atlas.

"Why's the Valley of Bowser on the list?" asked Marcus. "He hasn't used that in years!"

"You never know." The boys all began to argue.

"Wait a second," interrupted Nazz. "You all know about them?"

"Since, like, the beginning of camp," said Calvin.

"It's his fault they got out in the first place," Eddy pointed at Calvin.

"And proud of it!" grinned Calvin,

Suddenly, a loud fanfare cut them off. They turned to see the Hitchhiking Ghosts marching along with a Disney-style parade float. On it, sat a surprisingly muscular Double D.

Hitchhiking Genies: **_Make way for Double D_**

_**Say hey! It's Double D**_

Ezra: **_Hey! Clear the way on the sidewalk now_**

Phineas: **_Hey you! _**

_**Let us through! **_

Gus: **_And you better bow_**

Ezra: **_Oh, come! _**

_**Be the first on your block to meet his eye! **_

Gus: **_Make way!_**

Phineas: **_Here he comes!_**

Gus: **_Ring bells! Bang the drums!_**

Ezra: **_Are you gonna love this guy!_**

_**Double D! A member is he **_

_**Of Ed, Edd, 'n Eddy**_

_**Genuflect, show some respect **_

_**Down on one knee! **_

_**Girls, you just hold yourselves back**_

_**He's busy, cut him some slack**_

'_**Cause this guy does everything amazingly**_

Phineas: **_Double D_**

_**Amazing is he**_

_**And we all know it**_

_**Smart as ten genius men, definitely! **_

Gus: **_He makes robots everyday_**

Ezra: **_And they're amazing I say_**

Phineas: **_Who is great all of the way?_**

All Three: **_Why, Double D_**

Gus: **_He's got millions of awesome inventions_**

Ezra: **_And a cactus_**

Ed: **_And a stinky hat_**

Phineas: **_With his bugs, you'll want to pay attention_**

Gus: **_Well, he's got some ants_**

Ezra: **_And I bet you shan't_**

All Three: **_Ever see something else like that_**

Marie: **_Double D! Handsome is he, and we all know it_**

_**Has nice shoes, could never lose**_

_**Playing hockey**_

_**Well, we'll all scramble about**_

_**He's a big target and stout **_

_**But we'll catch him an make out with Double D**_

(Sung in counterpoint)

Lee and May: **_There's no question that he's quite alluring_**

_**Though his intellect may leave some snoring**_

_**Thankfully, we girls are just so sophisticated**_

_**Of course, when he sees us, he'll go running**_

'_**Cause he finds us a bit less than stunning**_

_**So we gotta drug him first, so he's sedated**_

Gus: **_His labeled stuff is updated all day_**

(Eddy: **_How'd he get so strong? How'd he get so strong?_**)

_**And to use them, he charges no fee **_

(Calvin and Hobbes:**_ It's disturbing, it's disturbing_**)

_**He's got other stuff that we didn't say**_

(Jason and Marcus: **_What is going on!_**)

All Three: **_He's got that and more but you are sure_**

_**He's much better than you and me, Double D! Double D...**_

(They have reached the pool. Ezra knocks Double D in the water, and the ghosts jump in as well. Everything starts to rumble, and the four emerge, riding on a large fountain system)

_**Double D**_

_**A member is he of Ed, Edd, 'n Eddy**_

Ezra: **_He's so strong, why, in a thong he'd look lovely_**

_**Yes, he worked out and he ate, improved his strength and his weight**_

All Three: **_His exercising stuff's 'least fifty pounds_**

_**If they fell, they'd leave a hole in the ground**_

_**Finally he's buff, this guy's looking tough**_

_**Now he's here for all to see**_

_**He's Double D!**_

Nazz walked over in shock. "Double D? But what happened to the Koopas and the..."

"Those weren't Koopas!" interrupted Ezra.

"Ezra..." warned Double D, wanting to tell the truth.

Ignoring him, Ezra continued. "They were...frat boys."

"Frat boys!" exclaimed Nazz.

"What did you think they were, terrorists?" said Phineas.

"I was worried about you!" Nazz angrily stomped away.

"Dork!" called Kevin. Everyone went back to ignoring Double D and started playing in the pool.

Double D stared in shock. "She didn't even notice the muscles..."

The Koopas peered in. "Double D has the lamp!" hissed Bowser. "He's in trouble now!"

Eddy, Calvin, Hobbes, Jason, and Marcus were also watching. "This makes absolutely no sense!" cried Calvin.

"Which is really saying something for this camp," added Hobbes. "What are the Hitchhiking Ghosts doing here?"

Jason started thinking. "With the Koopas, ghosts, and a strong Double D, this could mean one thing...alien invasion!"

Marcus rushed off. "I'll get the satellite!"

"Look at Double D..." sighed Eddy. "Hitting on Nazz, impressing everyone. What happened to us?"

"Oh, come on," said Calvin. "It's been less than a day!"

Eddy simply walked away in disgust. "We used to be thick, how quick they forget!"

"Harsh," said Gus, regarding Nazz.

"You're not getting any tonight, man," agreed Ezra.

Double D looked up. "'Not getting any...' did you just make a casual reference to..."

"Don't blame your dirty, dirty thoughts on me," cried Ezra. "Now get your mind out of the gutter, 'cause we've got to help you get this girl!"

"I like gutters," said Ed.

Double D sighed. "I hope this works..."

* * *

The "Double D" song was originally for an episode called "Doomsday" where Eddy, Jason, and Marcus trick Double D into building them a device of mass destruction. Near the beginning, they win him over in a song. It was virtually identical to the one here aside from the final verse:

_**Double D**_

_**A member is he of Ed, Edd, 'n Eddy**_

_**Pardon my greed, but we do need something of ye**_

_**It would be so fine, if you gave us doomsday designs**_

_**With sixty lazers, cannons galore**_

_**With bullets and blasters**_

_**A few bombs and more**_

_**With violent things, a little bell that rings**_

_**That's what we all need, you see...**_

_**...Thanks, Double D!**_

There was also a few altered lines in the finale of this as well:

_**Double D a member is he of Ed, Edd, 'n Eddy**_

_**Was distressed 'cause he weighed less than seventy**_

_**He's really been working out, so hopefully no one doubts**_

_**He's got a lot of weights, 'least fifty pounds**_

...etc.


	7. A Whole New World and Bowser's Revenge

That night, Double D was sitting under Nazz's window in the Cul-De-Sac. "Oh, curses! What ever am I going to do?"

"You've gotta wow the girl!" suggested Ezra.

"Or at least ooh her," said Phineas.

"'Ooh her?'" repeated Double D.

"When she says 'wow,' you've wowed her, and when she says 'ooh,' you've oohed her," explained Gus. "It's not rocket science."

"But I AM a rocket scientist!" defended Double D. "Oh, never mind. I think I should just tell her the truth."

"NOOOOOO!" screamed Ezra. "You can't do that! The series would be ruined if everyone knew about the Koopas! We've already screwed stuff up with other people being able to see Hobbes, but the fact that only a few battle with these monsters keeps the spirit of the comic to an extent!"

Double D looked down. "But if I don't tell her, our relationship may be ruined."

"Priorities, man!" chorused the ghosts/genies. "COME ON!"

"Fine...wait, I have an idea! Ed!" Double D called his friend.

Ed, who was sleeping under a tree, woke up. "I just dreamed that I was in a funhouse with dancing pigs."

Double D smiled politely. "I'm not sure what that means psychologically, but do you remember when you blew up your jacket like a balloon when we were in the sewer pipe?"

"Yeah, I do that all the time."

"Can you please do it now?"

"Okey dokey, smokey!" Ed blew up his jacket again, it resembling a blimp this time.

"Thank you!" called Double D, floating upwards.

"Well," smiled Ezra, "it looks like you've got everything under cover. We're gonna relax in the lamp. Where is it, again?"

"Under my hat," reminded Double D.

The ghosts all flew under. "This is what's under there? I figured it would be more shocking."

"This isn't shocking to you?" gasped Gus. "What a freak."

Nazz opened her window to see Double D flying outside. "Double D?"

"I wanted to apologize to you, Nazz. I didn't mean to lie about the..." he shuddered, "frat boys."

"Well," shrugged Nazz, "you know why I was mad."

"I do. Would a ride make it up to you?"

"A ride? On...that?"

"It's surprisingly clean," admitted Double D, "despite the fact that it's regularly worn by Ed."

"Oh. Okay." Nazz climbed on and they took off, flying over the Cul-De-Sac and the camp area.

Double D: **_I can show you the world_**

_**Shining, shimmering, splendid**_

_**Tell me, Nazz please, now when did**_

_**You last let your heart decide?**_

_**I can open your eyes**_

_**Take you wonder by wonder**_

_**Over, sideways and under**_

_**On a magic carpet ride**_

_**A whole new world**_

_**A new fantastic point of view**_

_**No one to tell us no**_

_**Or where to go**_

_**Or say we're only dreaming**_

Nazz: **_A whole new world_**

_**A dazzling place I never knew**_

_**But when I'm way up here**_

_**It's crystal clear**_

_**That now I'm in a whole new world with you**_

Double D: **_Now I'm in a whole new world with you_**

Nazz: **_Unbelievable sights_**

_**Indescribable feeling**_

_**Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling**_

_**Through an endless diamond sky**_

_**A whole new world**_

Double D: **_Don't you dare close your eyes_**

Nazz: **_A hundred thousand things to see_**

Double D: **_Hold your breath, it gets better_**

Nazz: **_I'm like a shooting star_**

_**I've come so far**_

_**I can't go back to where I used to be**_

Double D: **_A whole new world_**

Nazz: **_Every turn a surprise_**

Double D: **_With new horizons to pursue_**

Nazz: **_Every moment red-letter_**

Both: **_I'll chase them anywhere_**

_**There's time to spare**_

_**Let me share this whole new world with you**_

Nazz: **_A whole new world_**

Double D: **_That's where we'll be_**

Nazz: **_A thrilling chase_**

Double D: **_A wondrous place_**

Both: **_For you and me _**

Finally, they landed on a rooftop overlooking the campus. "That was so awesome!" marveled Nazz.

Double D felt guilty. "Yes, it...it...I CAN'T LIE ANYMORE! Those WERE the Koopas! I'm an awful person and I've just ruined the series!"

Nazz stared at him in shock. "Uh...well, you told the truth eventually, right?"

Double D looked up. "You're not mad?"

"Not since you told me."

"I have a feeling that this will seem like an easy relationship..." Double D smiled.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later, Double D was flying away after dropping Nazz off at her house. "Goodnight, Nazz."

"'Night."

"YES!" cheered Double D after she had closed her window. "A tad anticlimactic, but it was a success!" He sighed dreamily and drifted down on his jacket-blimp.

Suddenly as he reached the ground, the waiting Koopalings pulled the plug on it, sending the jacket-blimp fly around madly. As it came back down, the Koopas pulled Double D off and tied him up.

Bowser stood over him. "Thought you could hide your lamp from us, did you?" he asked in a sinister voice.

"Well, you can't!" yelled Roy.

Bowser glared at his son. "He knows you can't."

"Huh?"

"I was asking him a hypothetical question," explained an annoyed Bowser. "Answering it sorta ruins the impact."

"Not by much!" argued Roy.

"Yes it does!"

"No, I know where he's coming from," defended Ludwig. "Roy's just sort of adding to it, not detracting. It adds a bit more of an ironic twinge."

"I didn't understand all of that," said Roy, "but if you're on my side, I agree!"

Bowser sighed. "...let's just take him to the lava pit."

Ed was sleeping next to them. "Go, piggies!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Soon, Double D was chained miles above a deep lava pit. Steam rose under him.

Larry hovered by him in the Clown Copter. "Okay, here's the rundown. We rummage through your house and personal belongings and find the lamp. Then we drop you in the lava pool. If we can't find the lamp, we come back here, THREATEN to drop you in, and then once you tell us where it is..."

"You drop me in?"

"Wrong! We...oh, wait, you're right. We drop you in. Bye." The Koopa flew away.

Double D frantically struggled. "Must...get...lamp...from...under...hat!" Suddenly,

the lamp slipped out and fell towards the lava. "Oh no!"

"Hey," Ezra said inside the lamp as it fell to the heat below, "you guys feel a draft or something?"

"I'll check the door." Phineas peeked out. "Hey, since when did the weather get so hot?"

Gus leaned out as well. "Ooh, pretty lava."

"LAVA!" cried Ezra. "We don't want a _Return of Jafar _ending!" Ezra made a pillow appear over the lava. The lamp safely landed on it.

"What a relief," breathed Double D. His shackles suddenly fell off the crumbling stone wall, sending him falling towards the lava as well. "HELP ME!"

"Wish for it!" called Phineas. "We can't cheat on this one!"

"Can't you just extend your pillow!" asked Double D, much closer to the lava now.

"Nope," said Gus.

"What do you mean, 'nope!'"

"Our magic can save ourselves," explained Ezra, "but we're physically unable to save you without you wishing for it!"

"FINE!" screamed Edd. "I WISH FOR YOU TO SAVE ME!"

"Cool," said Gus. They stretched the pillow out, catching Double D.

"Thank you," he said, sighing with relief again.

Ezra smiled. "Aww, we had to save you, right?"

"You're our favorite master," said Phineas. "And...our only master."

Double D laughed.

"And he laughs at dumb jokes like that!" said Gus. "He's valuable to us!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They flew back to Double D's house. "Hmm," said Double D, inspecting the damage. "The Koopas haven't trashed my room too badly."

"Well," said Ezra, "they obviously couldn't find the lamp. What a bunch of morons."

Phineas realized something. "Uh-oh...what if they went after..."

"NAZZ!"

* * *

Really wish I could have done more with the "Whole New World" song, but it really worked well as it was. 


	8. Bowser Rises To Power

Double D rushed into Nazz's room to find that the Koopas had her surrounded.

"WHERE'S THE LAMP?" yelled Bowser.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" cried Nazz.

Ludwig thought about this. "Wait a second! This means that Double D has it right now!"

Wendy grabbed Nazz. "Let's kill her and then get him!"

Double D stepped out. "Not so fast, Koopas.

"Wow," said Bowser, "this day has been, like, so convenient. Koopa Pack! Attack!"

The Koopalings rush for him. Double D jumped up and grabbbed Jr's wand and hit him with it. He zapped Iggy and Lemmy, who collapsed. Larry and Roy ran for him, but tripped over the three fallen Koopas. Double D kicked Roy's shell, sending it bouncing around the room. It hit the remaining Koopas.

"I think we should retreat!" suggested Ludwig.

"Good idea!" said Bowser, pulling out a magic potion. "He who koops and runs away, lives to koop another day!" Bowser threw the potion at the wall, creating a door. The Koopas all ran through.

"What's going on?" asked Nazz.

"They're escaping into a warp zone!" pointed Double D. The door disappeared.

Nazz jumped into Double D's arms. "That was SOOOOOOO awesome! Tomorrow, I'm announcing to everyone that we're a couple!"

"A couple?" repeated Double D. Suddenly, he felt very guilty. He wasn't even acting like himself! What had happened?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day, Double D walked through the hallway at camp, wondering what he should do. Just then, the Hitchhikers burst out of the lamp, which was in his backpack. "You did it!" cheered Ezra. "Hail the conquering hero!"

(To the tune of "The Mickey Mouse Club March")

Hitchhikers: **_Who's the leader of this club that's made for you and me?_**

_**D-O-U-B-L-E D. he's Double D!**_

"Weird..." said Gus. "He looks depressed."

Phineas smiled. "Aww, I bet you're just gonna miss us now that we're being wished FREE!"

"I can't," said Double D.

"What do you mean, you can't!" cried Ezra. "I knew you couldn't commit!"

"I know that what I'm doing is horrible and immoral," admitted Double D, "but Nazz loves me now...without you, I'm nothing."

"You weren't nothing," said Gus.

"But you are now that you're turning on us," said Phineas, as the three genies/ghosts returned to the lamp.

Ed, who had been watching, made a puppy dog face and left.

"Ed," called Double D, "please don't look at me like...fine, I...I just don't care! I need to think." He sighed and walked away.

As he left, Iggy and Lemmy hopped out of a Mario Book.

"Is he..." began Iggy.

"...gone?" continued Lemmy. "I think so!"

"Good, now let's check..."

"...in his backpack!" Lemmy pulled something out. "It's the lamp!"

"Now King Dad will be..." started Iggy.

"...so proud!" finished Lemmy. "And he'll stop complaining..."

"...about how creepy it is when we finish each others sentences!" they said together. Laughing, they ran off with the lamp.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Meanwhile, Double D had run into Nazz.

"Double D! Dude!" Nazz grabbed him and pulled him into the camp's gym. "Come on! We've gotta tell everyone!"

"Nazz, there's still something I must tell you..."

"Everyone!" announced Nazz. "Double D and me are a couple now!"

"How did the dork manage to do it?" wondered Kevin.

"I can't believe this!" cried Eddy from the crowd of kids. "This is the final straw!"

"Is this the last time we'll see him?" asked Jason.

"Probably," nodded Marcus.

"He won't be coming to any more GROSS meetings," agreed Calvin, "I'll tell you that!"

"Come on, guys," said Hobbes. "Double D is still our friend! The least we can do is be happy for him."

The four other boys shook their heads. "Nope."

Hobbes sighed. "It's hard being a tiger with morals."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Koopas meanwhile, were in their castle's highest tower, overlooking the distant Mushroom Kingdom.

"In a few minutes, kids," grinned Bowser, "that'll all be ours!"

"Oh boy!" cheered Jr. "You'll finally get the glory that you deserve!"

"Got that right!" laughed the Koopa king. The second Bowser wasn't looking, Roy punched Jr.

Bowser suddenly grew grim sat down. " You know, I guess this all dates back to my childhood..."

(To the tune of "Why Me")

Bowser: **_Back when I was just a Koopaling_**

_**I never could truly accomplish anything**_

_**Even Baby Mario, would just get away and go**_

_**Why me? Why me?**_

_**For an amazing and great villain**_

_**How is it that I never do win?**_

_**Never killed a single guy and it makes me want to cry**_

_**Why me? Why me?**_

_**Why was I never able to take over a summer camp?**_

_**Thankfully I got my evil claws on this great magical lamp**_

_**Yes, here's the rub!**_

_**Rub-a-dub-dub!**_

Bowser rubbed the lamp. The Hitchhikers emerged. "Well, well, well," said Ezra, not paying attention to his surroundings, "if it isn't the exploiting little master..."

Suddenly, the three ghosts/genies realized where they were. "KOOPAS!"

"That's right!" said Bowser. "I'M your master now, you stupid genies!"

"Uh, actually," corrected Phineas, "we're ghost-genie-hybrids."

"Yeah!" said Ezra. "See, it all started at Disney World. We were flying through Adventureland and saw the Genie from _Aladdin_. Everyone loved him and..."

Bowser cut him off. "Shut up! I don't care!"

"Rude," grumbled Gus.

"For my first wish," hissed Bowser, "I wish to be ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The kids at camp, meanwhile, were still in the gym. Suddenly, Kamek jumped in and zapped them all with their wand. "We've got a surprise for you, kids!"

Suddenly, the kids were all transported to the Mushroom Kingdom, sitting in front of Peach's Castle.

"What's going on!" asked Charlie Brown.

"It's a long story," said Calvin. "Remember a few weeks ago when I was reading a choose your own adventure book...?"

Peach, Mario, Luigi, Toad, and Yoshi were suddenly knocked out of the castle.

Peach got to her feet. "Who dares to kick me out of my own throne!"

"It's me..." said an evil voice. Bowser burst out onto the castle's balcony. "Your new ruler!"

Everyone laughed. Bowser looked down to see that he was wearing Peach's pink dress. "What's the meaning of this!"

"Sorry," smiled Ezra, "we thought this would be a good prank."

"You morons!" Bowser ripped off the dress, but put a giant gold crown on his head.

Bowser:**_ I have power, I have clout personified_**

_**There are some ghosts with sheer malice on my side**_

_**It's a combination which hooks me up to fever pitch**_

_**These three and me**_

"As ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom," he announced, "I declare war on that stupid summer camp! Enslave them all unless they bow to me now!"

In response, everyone just sort of sat there in silence. "Plank," whispered Johnny, "do you have any idea what's going on?"

"We're not gonna bow!" called Calvin. "Make us!"

"Oh, I'm ready for that!" roared Bowser. "My second wish, genies!"

"Ghost-genie-hybrids," reminded Phineas.

"I wish to be an all-powerful sorcerer!" Energy shot through Bowser. His crown turned black and he now wore a cape.

Kamek was taken aback. "Oh my. Um, Lord Bowser, if you're all-powerful...what does that make me?"

"FIRED!" Bowser shot some lightning bolts out of his claws, sending Kamek flying into the distance.

Bowser: **_When the master of the lamp says bow, you bow_**

_**You forget who wears the pants around here now**_

_**A guy who knows just what to do and who to do it to**_

_**Who's he? M-E!**_

_**And as for you, you little twerp**_

_**From now on it's as you were time**_

(Double D: "It's as I was time?")

_**Let's have your little girlfriend see how she's been wasting her time**_

_**I'll strip him bare...and there's nothing there!**_

"That's right, ladies and gentlemen!" he laughed. "We have a special surprise for you..." The Koopalings all grabbed Double D and Nazz and threw them onto the balcony.

(The song switches to "Prince Ali Reprise")

Bowser: **_Double D_**

_**I stole from he**_

_**Three brand-new wishes**_

_**Read my lips and come to grips**_

_**With reality**_

_**Yes, I've got three stupid ghosts**_

_**Who'll turn the whole world to toast**_

_**Thanks to our good friend, Double D!**_

Bowser zapped Double D. He instantly went back to his former tiny self.

"Ooh," Roy said sarcastically with a big smile, "so sad."

"Back to seventy pounds!" laughed Wendy.

"Well," sighed Double D, "I suppose I deserved that..."

Bowser: **_Double D, turns out to be, merely still wimpy_**

_**He's a sap, 'cause with my zap**_

_**The world's history**_

_**He's naive, fortunately**_

_**For he has given to me**_

_**A chance to destroy Princess Peach**_

_**A victory for them is beyond all reach**_

_**I sure commend ya, to thank you, I'll send ya**_

_**Straight to Iced Land, whoopee!**_

_**So, thanks**_

_**Our Double D!**_

Double D was tied to several Bob-Ombs. They exploded and sent him flying into the distance, much like Kamek had been. Ed saw this and blew up his jacket like a blimp again. He jumped on and flew after his friend.

"This is all very shocking," thought Snoopy, "but WHAT IS ALL THIS!"

(The song goes back to "Why Me?")

Bowser: **_I'm sorry, but you've all lost_**

_**Couldn't beat the final boss**_

_**Someone's finally defeated all of you**_

_**Who?**_

_**WHY, ME!**_

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

* * *

Ooh, spooky. "Why Me" is a deleted song from the movie that can be found on the DVD. One verse has been cut out of this version, only so I could include a version of the "Prince Ali Reprise." 


	9. High Adventure

Far off in the distant freezing Iced Land, Double D landed in the snow. "Iced Land...the first thing I saw when I came here so many weeks ago...ironically, it may also be the last thing I see."

Kamek, who had also been sent there, popped his head out of the snow. "I should have known not to trust that guy!"

"Well," shrugged Double D, "any of us could have told you that. It's common sense, my good Kamek. Of course, I was moronic enough to trust you back in the dungeon, but that's another..."

"Enough!"shouted Kamek. "I may be fired, but I can at least finish you!" Kamek ran for Double D with his wand extended, when a Piranha Plant came out of a pipe and ate the MagiKoopa in a second.

Double D stared in shock. "That's partly comforting and partly unnerving."

Suddenly, a white puffy creature skated over. Double D recognized him. "Flurry! Lemmy's pet snowman, an enemy who appeared in 'Super Mario Brothers 2!' Actually, in Japan it's called 'Super Mario USA,' because it's actually a..."

Flurry shoved Double D. "I get it," said Double D, "you want me to stop talking. Okay, Flurry...you can stop pushing me now...oh dear." Double D realized that he was being pushed towards a ledge which dropped into a freezing ocean. "The Koopas sent you, didn't they? Fine...push away. I have nothing left."

Double D was shoved over the edge. However, he landed on the jacket-blimp, driven by Ed.

"Nothing? I am Ed!"

"Ed!" cried Double D. "Oh, I'm so relieved!"

Flurry saw this and accidently slipped off the edge, plunging into the icy water.

"Well," said Double D, watching him sink, "I think we can skip saving him, seeing as sub-zero water temperatures won't affect someone made out of frozen water."

Ed nodded. "He reminds me of the killer snowmen in 'Death-sicle 3: The Miniseries.'"

"I missed you, Ed. Hurry! We must get back to camp! I have a feeling everyone needs our help..."

They found a warp pipe on a nearby ledge and jumped in. The two emerged out of a book in the camp's main room, only to duck back in as two Hammer Bros. walked by.

"Hammer Bros?" whispered Double D. "Aside from them, the room's empty! Bowser's obviously been here!"

"Body Snatchers!" agreed Ed.

"We'd better sneak by them and do a quick search for anyone," advised Double D. They darted by the Hammer Bros. when they weren't looking and opened up the door of a storage closet to see Calvin, Hobbes, Eddy, Jason and Marcus inside.

"Close the door, will ya?" cried Calvin. "Those Koopas are looking for us!"

"There they are!" shouted one of the Hammer Bros. "Get them!"

Calvin sighed and calmly stomped on the two of them.

"Bowser's captured everyone but us," explained Hobbes. "They're in his castle."

"Why are you telling him this!" cried Eddy. "He's deserted us!"

Jason looked guilty. "Uh, actually, we were thinking about this."

"It's more like we've deserted HIM," nodded Marcus.

"Well," glared Eddy, "asking Nazz out was a bad move."

Double D narrowed his eyes. "For whom, might I ask?"

Eddy thought for a few seconds. "Uh...darn it."

"Look," said Double D, "I honestly apologize for everything! But all the kids and the Hitchhiking...ghost-genie-hybids...are in trouble! They need us!"

Jason jumped up. "Yeah! Let's go risk our lives again!"

"If they don't thank us for this..." grumbled Calvin as they ran to the Mario books.

"Isn't this great, Double D?" grinned Ed.

Double D jumped in. "Indeed! High adventure!"

* * *

Sorry about how short the chapter was, but I want the climactic fight to be its' own chapter. 


	10. The Battle

In the redecorated (and much more Koopa-like) Peach's castle, Bowser was sitting in his new throne with Gannondorf. "So..."grinned Bowser, "what do you think? I sure did a number on them!"

Gannondorf rolled his eyes. "You bullied a bunch of kids and some mushrooms. I'd call you stupid for attacking pathetic beings lower than you, but that would be hypocritical, as I always beat you up."

Bowser growled. "Why you..." He angrily zapped Gannondorf.

"That actually hurt a little bit. Not bad." Gannondorf left.

The second he was gone, Bowser squealed like a girl. "EEEEEEEE!!!! OhmyGodohmyGodohmyGod! Gannondorf just said 'not bad' to ME!"

Luigi, Mario, and Toad sat in a nearby cage. "This is just sad," sighed Luigi.

"You said it," agreed Mario.

"HEY!" yelled Bowser. "Did I say you could talk?! Just eat your pasta!"

Mario sprang at his food, desperate with hunger. "Pasta, food, yes, pasta, yum, food, pasta, good!"

"Bowser," groaned Lugi, "we know that it's obviously been poisoned. We're too smart to...Mario, don't eat that!"

Mario was now tiny, due to the poison. "It was worth it."

Bowser strolled over to the Hitchhikers. "Ya know, all in all, you guys have really helped me."

Ezra glared at him. "Yeah, how 'bout you do us all a favor and DON'T give us credit?"

"I have power," continued Bowser, "the Mario Bros. and the campers are mine to torment, my kids are happy..." He motioned to the Koopalings, who were preforming the Riverdance on Yoshi's back. "...and Gannondorf complemented me! There's just one thing left to do!"

"Wish us free?" Phineas asked hopefully.

"No. Wish for a bride! The beautiful Princess Peach."

"We can't do that," Gus shook his head.

"WHY NOT?" shouted Bowser.

"See," smiled Ezra, happy to refuse something to Bowser, "there are some rules. One is that we can't..."

"I SAID I WANTED A BRIDE! GIVE ME A BRIDE!"

Peach, who was chained to the throne, looked up to see Double D and the gang sneaking in through a window. Getting the idea to distract Bowser, she got his attention. "Excuse me, Bowser...I think the only things hotter than you are the beautiful flames you breathe."

Bowser rushed over. "Zing! That's better!"

"Hey, Bowser!" Nazz called from a cage, getting the idea, "Are your sons available?"

Phineas turned to his friend in confusion. "Ezra?"

"Yeah?"

"What's going on?"

"The poor things must have finally snapped," sighed Ezra. "Desperation will do that to a woman, you know."

Wendy glared at the seven Koopaling males, who were flocking around Nazz. "My brothers are not about to fall for some easy human who puts out so..." She looked up to see the guys sneaking in. "Hey! It's those guys!"

Bowser whirled around. "THEM!"

"That was a close one," Peach sighed with relief. "I thought I'd actually have to kiss you!"

Bowser quickly kissed Peach anyway and then sprang for the kids. He zapped them, and they all fell to the ground in the middle of the throne room.

"Should we kill them?" asked Larry.

"Don't tire yourselves," smiled Bowser. "I have a fun idea."

Several tall cages burst out of the floor. Jason and Ed were trapped in the first one, Eddy and Marcus in the second, Calvin and Hobbes in the third, and Bowser and Double D in the fourth. "It's time for some Super Smash Bros.-style action!" shouted the Koopa King.

Enemies dropped from the sky. In Jason and Ed's cage, it was Tryclyde (the three-headed snake from_ Super Mario Bros. 2_). In Ed and Marcus's cage, it was Boom-Boom (the huge apelike monster from _Super Mario Bros. 3_), and in Calvin and Hobbes's cage, it was some Renzors (the four dinosaurs from _Super Mario World_).

"YAY!" cheered the Koopalings from the sidelines. "Cage match!"

Bowser jumped around, trying to ground-pound Double D, who ran for it, causing Bowser to make several large holes in the ground. In Jason and Ed's cage, Tryclyde continuously snapped at them, spewing fire.

"Evil snake!" cried Ed.

"I have an instruction manual on me!" said Jason, dodging the fireballs. "It says I need to throw some brick-like mushroom blocks at him!"

"Idea!" Ed threw himself at Tryclyde, who was instantly defeated.

"Good enough," said Jason.

Bowser, meanwhile, was still after Double D. "You're just stalling!"

"I'm well aware of that!"

In their cage, Marcus and Eddy were dodging Boom-Boom. "I can't believe this!" groaned Marcus. "Boom-Boom?! We might as well be fighting a Hammer Bro! He's too easy!"

"If he's so easy," complained Eddy, "why are we running for our lives?!"

"I never said we weren't easier."

Boom-Boom jumped for them, but Eddy bounced off the gates and sprang back, stomping him in the head. Marcus jumped on him two more times, defeating him.

"Two down, two to go!" called Ezra. "WOO!"

"I should at least count as three myself!" yelled Bowser.

"Make us!" grinned Phineas.

"Jerk," added Gus.

Calvin and Hobbes jumped around, knocking the four Renzors off their stands. Suddenly, the floor opened up, revealing lava. They jumped onto the Renzor platforms to save themselves.

"Hobbes?" said Calvin. "We've been through a lot, buddy."

"Like all the times we got each other in trouble...I'll miss those times."

"What?" cried Calvin. "You thought I was being dramatic? I was just reminiscing. We can get by this in a second!"

Calvin and Hobbes jumped across. Hobbes used his claw to pick the lock on the cage and ran around freeing the others.

"YES!" cheered Ezra. "The only thing that could beat this was the time me and my girlfriend...well, this story ain't rated 'M' so never mind..."

"We're barely pushing 'T' as it is," agreed Phineas.

"Hey," Kevin admitted, still in the cage, "the dork is doing good!"

"I love you, Double D!" called Nazz.

Double D stopped and turned to Nazz. "I love you, too!"

Bowser came down on him. Double D jumped out of the way at the last second, causing Bowser to make a huge hole in the ground and fall through. The kids cheered.

Larry, however, wasn't happy with this. "We're still here! Get them!"

Not caring about the Koopalings, "Ezra, Phineas, and Gus plowed through the Koopalings. "Outta the way!" yelled Gus.

Ezra started leading the kids towards the door. "Victory! Okay, let's all get out of here! We can convince the kids that it was all a hallucination caused by the stupid pool's chlorine or something!"

Phineas turned to Mario. "Hey, Mario, why aren't you happy?"

"Well, sometimes he's really gone, but sometimes when you think the final boss is really out of here, he comes back and gets you."

The ground rumbled. A bigger, scarier version of Bowser rose out. "You think I'm defeated so easily now? I have magical powers! Try dealing with GIGA BOWSER!"

"Yep," said Mario, "this is one of those times."

Calvin started running again. "Once again, we're gonna have to RUN FOR OUR LIVES!"

"It gets old after a while!" added Hobbes.

Giga Bowser slammed his claw into the wall, causing a great section of it to collapse onto the door, blocking everyone's exit. He then reached down and picked up Double D. "I'm gonna crush every one of you...starting with this one!"

"Crush me?" scoffed Double D. "How quaint. You can do anything and you decide to simply CRUSH me? Really. I'm sure the Hitchhiking Ghost-genie-hybrids..."

"Thanks!" called Phineas.

"...could be a lot more creative!" continued Double D. "They have more power than you'll ever have!"

"Hey," said Ezra, "don't drag us in here...we're peaceful guys."

Giga Bowser, however, saw where Double D was coming from. "You're right! But not for long...genies!"

"Ghost-genie-hybrids!" whined Phineas. "Double D just said..."

"Will you forget about that?!" hissed Gus.

"I wish to be a genie as well!" shouted Giga Bowser. "All powerful!"

"You know," sighed Ezra, "they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but..." he sadly zapped Giga Bowser, who began to glow. He transformed into a genie, who was somehow even bigger, badder, and an evil shade of red.

"The power!" roared the Koopa-genie-hybrid as he burst through the castle's ceiling. "More, more, more! Everything I wanted and MORE!"

"How cool is this?!" grinned Jason.

Marcus nodded. "If only Frodo was here. Then it would be perfect..."

"We're about to die!" reminded Eddy.

"Oh yeah," remembered Jason. "Forgot about that."

"However, Bowser," Double D smiled innocently, "you've forgotten one thing...the lamp!" A lamp appeared under Bowser. Double D grabbed it. "You now belong to me!"

"Stop him!" ordered Bowser. The Koopalings sprang for Double D, but the army of kids held them back.

Double D flashed Bowser a confident grin and rattled off his three wishes. "For my first wish, I wish everything was back to normal! For my second, I wish no one but me, the ghost-genie-hybrids, Ed, and Eddy remembered this, and for my third, I wish that you were trapped in that lamp forever!"

Bowser painfully granted all the wishes He was then sucked down into the lamp. "NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! This sucks!!!"

Ezra picked up the lamp. "Good one."

* * *

Originally, I thought about Bowser turning into Tryclyde himself, but Giga Bowser was a lot better. 


	11. Final Wish

Everything around them glowed. The castle was restored. The astonished kids were all transported back to camp, not remembering what had happened...everyone but Ed, Eddy, and Double D.

"Get me outta here!" Bowser shouted from inside his lamp. "Kids! Get them!"

"Are you kidding!" laughed Morton. "We were working our scaly butts off for the last five days and we deserve a break, vacation, rest!"

Jr rushed over. "Don't worry, King Dad! I know how to get you out! I'm gonna find ANOTHER genie and..."

"No you're not!" Roy grabbed Jr and stuffed him in the lamp. He then threw it out the window into the distance.

"They're gonna mad when they get out," said Iggy.

"You mean, if they get out," grinned Lemmy.

"If? If is good." The Koopalings all left.

Peach walked over to the Eds. "Peace has returned to my kingdom thanks to you, Double D."

"Please don't thank me, princess," said Double D. "Some of this was my fault."

Suddenly, an alien ship burst in through the stained-glass windows and abducted Peach.

"It's Tatanga!" cried Luigi. "He's captured the princess!"

"We'll save you!" called Mario. He and Luigi ran out, chasing the ship into the distance.

"Who the hell is Tatanga?" wondered Ezra.

"Wasn't that the girl on 'Boy Meets World?'" asked Phineas.

Ed hugged his friend. "Double D is a genius!"

Eddy rolled his eyes. "But if he's SUCH a genius, then how come he didn't wish Nazz would remember this?"

"Somehow, things would be awkward after that," explained Double D.

"Like they're not now?" grumbled Eddy.

"He's right, kid," admitted Ezra. "But you've got a wish left! Just say the word and she gets her memory back!"

"But what about your freedom?" asked Double D.

"Freedom?" shrugged Phineas. "We'll get out eventually."

"Yeah, we ain't going nowhere," agreed Gus.

Double D shook his head. "I wish you were free!"

"Okay," said Ezra, not hearing Double D, "she's gonna know all about...what?"

"Let freedom ring!" cheered Ed.

The ghosts glowed for a few brief seconds and then dropped to the floor. Their lamp disappeared.

"We're free..." said Ezra. "WE'RE FREE!"

Gus bounced around. "We're outta here!"

"We're alive!" cried Phineas. "Wait, that's not right."

"Close enough," said Ezra. "But we're ghosts again!"

"But aren't we still part genie?" Phineas pointed out.

"Too confusing," said Gus. "Let's never mention it again."

"Aw," groaned Phineas, "there are so many things we can't mention again."

"Only we know the real reason Mayor McCheese isn't at McDonald's anymore," Ezra whispered to the boys. "Freaky stuff..."

"Someone ate his head, right?" guessed Eddy.

"How did you know!"

"Oh, and be sure to ask Nazz out anyway!" reminded Phineas. "She likes you for you!"

"Totally," added Gus.

Ezra began to fly away. "Well, we've gotta get back to Disney World, but we'll come back here sometime!"

"Bye, guys!" called Phineas, flying away as well.

"See ya!" called Gus.

Ezra was almost out of sight now. "Don't let things get too shippy while we're gone!"

Just before they disappeared, the Eds heard Phineas say, "Think we'll have a 'Return of Jafar' sequel?"

"Plausible, but unlikely," replied Ezra.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Back at camp, Eddy finally finished his story. "And so, we all lived happily ever after. The end."

Apparently, he had been narrating the whole thing to Sarah and Jimmy, who didn't like it very much. "That was the worst story ever!"

"Was not!" Eddy shot back. "It really happened!"

"Then how come we don't remember it?" asked Jimmy.

"I told you," groaned Eddy, "it's because of that wish Double D made."

"Yeah, right! We're taking our money back!" Sarah and Jimmy walked away with their money. They passed Double D and Nazz, who appeared to be...flirting?

Eddy: **_So it ended that day when the ghosts flew away_**

'_**Cause we haven't seen them since then**_

_**But at they said they'd be back, and although they're slight quacks**_

_**I am sure they are planning when**_

'_**Cause I need much more tales where the hero prevails**_

_**Ones that don't make the girls go "ick"**_

_**So goodbye, tell your friends, so long now, that's the end**_

_**To another...another fanfic!**_

As Sarah and Jimmy rounded a corner, Ezra, Phineas, and Gus jumped out and scared them. Ezra tossed the money back to Eddy. "Made ya look!"

* * *

So are Double D and Nazz a couple again? Yes, but like Ezra said, it's hardly going to be mentioned. I'm really not much of a shipper, and since this series stars Calvin and Hobbes, I really don't want to have any romance. What can you do, right? Ans so ends another fanfic. 


End file.
